Baby Blanket
A friend of mine told me how grateful she was she had never been raped or sexually abused. She knew this was rare. Then she told me how, an ex-boyfriend called up his dealer and offered her up in exchange for drugs. She had no idea this conversation had happened. The dealer came over and tried to assault her (as promised). She ran for her life, and luckily, escaped.
About 90% of the women I know have experienced sexual trauma. Having this be a story that you have to be grateful for is not good enough. To have had a boyfriend who was willing to pimp you out for drugs but you were able to fend off the rapist? No, it makes me cry that this is “a lucky life”, I long for an era when10% of us narrowly escape a violation, and the rest of have lives of body sovereignty. Burn the patriarchy.
…
As I sew a quilt about the treatment of the feminine principle, I use memories of miracles to stay in the belief that someday things may improve. My first miracle:
When I was six I lost my baby blanket. It was my special blanket. It was cool in the Summer and warm in the Winter. It was comforting. I called it my nike, because it matched my nightgown which I couldn’t pronounce in my early days. I spent a month looking for my missing blanket. I looked everywhere in the house. I even looked at my friends’ houses, even though it never went outside. I was so sad!
At that time I had to meditate six minutes a day, one minute for each year I had been alive. It was pretty boring. At the end of my meditation I prayed to all the goddesses I could think of—I figured they would be more sympathetic than the gods. I prayed to Ganesha too—he is pretty adorable with that elephant head. I asked for my blanket back. I had been sitting on my bed and I laid down to rest. I reached my hand under the blanket, and felt my blanket!
Now I believe in prayer. Looking back it is my nike, or victory blanket. I decided to be very careful about what I prayed for because it really works. I have had many other prayers answered. I have been praying and praying and praying for things to improve in my family for years now. Please goddesses and Lord Ganesha, show us your grace.
